Resume of my Failure

"Do not go gentle into that good ,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light."

The Above couplets inspire me to get going in my darkest hour. My life, so far is all about rising again and again against the dying of the light. I have never found luxury to go gentle in my life. As my failures were never gentle to me.

Mr. Toastmaster, fellow toastmasters and all the warriors of light! Good evening!

Meet a guy who in his 7^th standard dropped out of a mediocre school on his own and convinced his father to send him to a coaching institute for one year so that he could get into a better school. Meet a guy who uptill his 5^th standard would study under a banyan tree but eventually went onto become the first engineer from his village by graduating from one of the prestigious institute of India, IIIT Gwalior. Meet a person who for the first time learnt English Alphabets in his 6^th standard and today is delivering his Toatmasters Competent Communicator project 4 in a corporate setting.

Meet a guy whose life has been full of failures but he has never given up. He has tasted failure in his every attempt. In his childhood, he failed to secure admission in all good preschools of his city. In 5^th std, he stood last in his first ever running competition of life. At secondary level, he got rejected at all the premier schools of his state. Yes, I am talking about myself, aka Mithilesh Kumar, 29 years old strange, stranded, struggling IT warrior. 

Most of what I try fails, but these failures are often invisible, while the successes are visible. I have felt that it gives others the impression that most things work out for me.  On the contrary, life is a stochastic process of equally distributed random failures and successes

Let’s have a deep dive into some of ‘My successful failures’:

Failure Type 1: Degree programs I did not get into
National Defense Academy, ISI Kolkata, SCRA closed doors for me at my first attempt. IIT did not let me in, even in my 3^rd attempt. I didn’t stop there, I raged against the failing of an engineer’s hope. I became enigmatic, energetic, evergreen IT engineer. J 

Failure Type 2: Startup attempts that got failed
Some say I was a forge entrepreneur, some say I was a garage entrepreneur.

Curious mind in Educational startups

Geeky guy in Software venture

Caring self in pharmaceutical business,

Cooking soul in Restaurant and Food processing business

Multifaceted personality in Media services business

And tens of ideas of fertile mind that did not even take off.

I failed almost in my every venture.

I didn’t go gentle there, I raged against all the odds, rebuilt myself in technology. Either you are fallen, fabricated or finished, don’t fail to start over all again. Because there is a great value in disaster, you can always start over again.

Failure Type 3: Job positions that I didn’t get
After starting over all again in the industry, I got failed again and again. I received 31 rejections in 40 tries at 4 different phases of career.
Every job interview taught me: Don’t go gentle. Work hard on your perseverance, preparation and perfection.
 
Failure Type 4: Love attempts that got rejected
How can I forget my love attempts! In my first ever love attempt, I was beaten hard by a girl classmate just for winking … in class 5 ;). Later, I got failed in my numerous love attempts.

 “Swelling fingers on hard lab's Logitech keyboards

Appealing social profile names, motivational status updates

Multiple SIMs, SMS packs and Santa-Banta jokes,

Late night, till morning, shaking free calls

'Simple living, high thinking', 'I can do anything for her'

All got crushed by cute, capricious crushes.”

In the end, I didn’t go gentle in my love attempts. I fought hard like a warrior and raged against the dying of light and got married ;). Now I am a happy father of an angel daughter. J

Despite this entire Resume of my failure, I am still enthusiastic, enigmatic and energetic. I am ready to challenge my weaknesses and to evolve like a phoenix. Yes I have been hurt many a times in my life, but I have learnt from those failures. I am determined like the Rock of Gibraltar that no matter what happens; I will transform my Resume of Failure into the Resume of Success. And I will do this for my daughter. J

As my first step towards this endeavor, I have decided to run a Triathlon and to deliver my speeches at world stage in Toastmasters. I am not going to go gentle into my life anymore. Rage Rage against the dying of light.

Over to you Mr/Madam toastmaster!